Meeting the “Space Between” in Real Life

We’ve all been there – stuck in traffic, waiting in line at the grocery store, or on hold with customer service. The minutes stretch into what feels like hours, frustrating and seemingly pointless. But isn’t it also part of the process?

It’s not always about what we’re doing or where we’re headed. It’s about the time it takes to get there: the space between.

Sometimes, that space feels small, unneeded, unwanted, and inconvenient – like waiting for the light to change. Other times, it feels monumental, like the distance between who you are now and the person you’re trying to become.

But what if, instead of frustration or impatience, you met those moments with curiosity and wonder?

These “spaces between” aren’t just annoyances, they mirror life’s bigger transitions: the moments when you’ve left what’s familiar but haven’t yet arrived at what’s next.

In those spaces, we’re tested. Do we resist and fidget, trying to escape? Or do we lean in, trusting the process, and wondering what might be waiting for us there?

What if the waiting wasn’t pointless at all? What if it was part of the transformation?

When do we stop being the person stuck in one place and become the person actively moving toward their next destination?

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A few months ago, I met a man who reminded me just how powerful these moments can be.

He was part of a retreat group I was working with. He came searching for answers. He was struggling with addiction and wanted to reclaim his life and find his way forward. Desperate for change. Desperate to break free from the cycle of relapses that had haunted him for years.

Recovery wasn’t a single decision for him. It was a series of micro choices, each one a battle, fought in the present moment, between who he was and who he wanted to become. Five years clean, then one slip, and suddenly, everything felt undone. Imagine the weight of carrying that moment left feeling like all your progress had vanished with a single lapse.

But here’s the truth: he wasn’t undone. He wasn’t back at zero. He was at a new beginning, this time carrying more wisdom, experience, determination, and pride.

In that moment, he didn’t revert to the beginning of the story. He had reached another moment, a new present, and it was that moment, not the past, that defined him.

During the retreat, he stood up in front of the group and admitted he had used crack just days before arriving. It was a moment that could have derailed everything.

What struck me wasn’t his struggle. I didn’t see a man defined by his relapse and the addiction that brought him there. I saw a man defined by his honesty and focus.

Later, in a quiet moment, he said to me, “I’m just a crackhead. I need to make a change.”

I looked at him and said, “I don’t see a crackhead. I see a man who is brave enough to tell the truth about something most people would never say out loud.”

That moment of truth was small, but it changed everything.

Which identity is true? Is he defined by the lapse or by the courage it took to admit it? By the slip or by the decision to stand back up?

In that moment, he wasn’t the man stuck in his struggle, he was the man taking the first step forward in the next phase of his journey.

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We often hear that “life is about the journey, not the destination.” But here’s the thing: the journey isn’t just the milestones we celebrate or the setbacks that can make us question everything. It’s also, and most importantly, the space between them – the waiting, the grind, the discomfort.

Most people think those in-between moments are inconveniences, but they’re not. They’re the place where transformation happens.

The space between is uncomfortable. It asks us to confront the distance between who we are and who we want to be. But it’s also where growth lives.

It’s not about being perfect or having all the answers. It’s about meeting those moments, the waiting, the discomfort, the truth, with courage and curiosity.

Your space between is waiting. Go meet it with courage, honesty, and curiosity. Transformation begins the moment you take that step.

What will you do with it?